Sometimes, life is just not fair. Nothing drives that sentiment home harder than an email we received last week. It was a plea for assistance for a family in our community, another family who had opened their home and hearts to children “in the system”. This couple had been fostering kids for years, providing a sense of stability and “normal” for youngsters while their families struggled to get their act together. They finally gave in to the inevitable (to many of us) and are now “forever family” to two young boys — a four-year old and an eight-year old boy. The joy within that family would have been tangible.
Less than two months after the adoption was finalized, fate reared her ugly head and struck — Glioblastoma – Stage 4. A fast-growing brain tumor was found in the dad — terminal and devastating. Different therapies and operations tried in a desperate bid for a cure – then for time — time that is slipping away.
My heart aches for this family on so many levels. The agony of seeing a loved one, once so robust and full of enthusiasm slowly becoming a shell as their body becomes weakened. The grief that comes from knowing what the future holds. The uncertainty those boys must be feeling at this time. They finally had a mom and dad, but soon that family dynamic will change. The man who offered them a home, love and committed to raising them into adulthood will not be there, despite his deepest wishes. The loss will be profound.
It’s not fair.
My heart aches for them. They are struggling on multiple levels. Dad is unable to work, and mom had to leave her job to care for her husband and children. Her days are filled with appointments, occupational, physical, speech, and doctor visits, struggling to keep her children’s world on an even keel, being strong for her husband and trying to keep germs away, the power on, and food on the table. She must be exhausted.
It’s not fair.
Life goes on. The boys need comforting and reassurance. She needs to figure out how to keep their home. The boys need clothes, shoes and Christmas gifts. She will comfort her husband as he grieves over what could have been. She is probably trying to to get through the holidays and to make certain that future ones are not tainted with sadness. It’s a terrible burden.
It’s not fair.
I am collecting gift cards and in-kind donations for this family. While we cannot give them a cure or time enough allowing those little boys to grow into men, we can give them the relief of day-to-day necessities — groceries, warm winter clothes, paper products, laundry supplies, dog food, gasoline, tires, donations toward utilities. If you should like to assist this family (name withheld for safety reasons), please send your donation to: From the Hayloft c/o The Circleville Herald, 401 E. Main Street, Circleville, OH 43113.
Life is not fair for this family, but I intend to at least make certain they see there is kindness in the world. I hope you do, too.