Remember the 1994 movie “Dumb and Dumber”? It came to mind recently when I saw an ad for its rerun on TV. I don’t know what was dumber, the characters portrayed in it or those, like me, that sat nearly two hours watching it
In my nearly 80 years on this Earth I have done some really stupid things. I’ll even bet I have a few more up my sleeve for later. You can be kind and say that is a part of the learning process. That can be true in that I do try not to repeat mine, but somehow come up with new ones just as dumb.
There are two that come to mind as candidates for the “Dumb and Dumber Hall of Fame”. To show stupidity knows no age restriction, mine were committed maybe 70 years apart. I am sharing them today as a warning to others, but the statute of limitations is about two weeks long. After which, I will deny any knowledge of either.
Once when I was maybe 10 years old I was given some fireworks. They were the smaller ones and not the bigger giants. They could make a lot of noise and play havoc with a tin can. In my adventures with them in our yard, I spied the gas tank next to the tractor shed.
Daddy had a large above ground gas tank for his tractor. He probably used it for his car also; I can’t remember. For some stupid reason, I put a firecracker on top of it and lit it. When it went off the metal tank amplified the sound. The tank was about half empty so the sound sort of vibrated through the empty part.
My grandmother heard it and came to the back door just in time to see me touch off the second one. She raced out of the house screaming “Do you want to cause an explosion and kill yourself and destroy everything around you?” It never dawned on me of the danger. I just thought how cool it sounded.
Fortunately, the tank was air tight and there were no fumes on the outside to ignite; otherwise, I could have beat Alan Shepard as the first American in space by years. It would have been interesting, although reentry could have been a problem.
My second memorable mental failure was not dangerous, but costly. Someone hit my parked car and drove off without leaving a note. I took it to the body shop and notified my insurance company. The garage had a difficult time getting parts and it took almost a month to get fixed.
Fortunately, the insurance company gave me a rental. This made it an inconvenience instead of a serious problem. Then stupidity entered the picture. The rental company asked if I wanted to buy insurance on the rental, and advised that it would be an out of pocket expense. I agreed to have it.
I don’t recall what the repair was as my insurance covered it. I do know I had to write a nearly $500 check for the insurance coverage. It wasn’t until about a week later that it dawned on me that a rental car was covered in my existing coverage making their policy redundant and expensive.
Those two adventures, years apart, are at the top of my dumb deeds. I can only hope that nothing comes along to knock either out of their current standing.
God bless and have a great day.